No offense to Canada.

I'm trying not to hold our current situation against the entire country of Canada. Before we moved here I had great memories of Pacific northwest trips taking the ferry to visit Victoria, camping all over Vancouver Island, spending weekends in Vancouver, BC, wandering around Granville Island, and braving the Capilano Suspension Bridge. I figured, how different can the other side of Canada be?

Our trip out here was a fun adventure too. We could have driven through America and crossed the border at Detroit but we decided to go through Canada instead, driving through British Columbia, Alberta, Saskatchewan, Manitoba, and Ontario. We learned our provinces and territories along the way, marveled at their funny-looking money, and sampled new and tasty junk food like ketchup chips, Coffee Crisp, and Kinder chocolate. We drove eastward for 5 days straight, smuggled the animals into roadside motels, learned about Canadian politics from public radio stations, and sampled mom-and-pop truck stop poutine. It was the ultimate epic family road trip with all expenses paid for by the company that hired my husband.

It wasn't until we made it to Toronto that the adventure started to unravel. Still, I don't hold this against Canadians. We've met some very nice people, visited fun and interesting museums and landmarks, and had our minds opened to a slightly different view of the world. We witnessed a civil election process and the excitement of new leadership under Justin Trudeau. I've been inspired by the way in which Canada has embraced the refugees fleeing Syria (while my home country turns its back) and I've admired how they are able provide health care for their residents (even us). We are wiser for this experience but I know now we don't belong here. I don't know where we belong anymore.